Autumn Leaves

Change. How do you feel when you hear that word? My stomach turns like a washing machine. Questions flood my nervous system, and I have to remember to breathe. Lately, the change I’ve been adjusting to is within my friend group. Between major life events like moving to different states, pursuing new dreams, marrying, having children, and building our lives, everything is changing.

The community I’ve gained in my twenties is close to my heart. Somehow, strangers became friends and friends became family. Unbeknownst to us, there was a bigger picture that would soon emerge from the background. Together, we’d navigate territory beyond anything we’d ever known.

My friends and I have shared the deepest laughter and the rawest tears. I’ve lost count of our inside jokes over the years. From traveling and event planning to late night conversations, and Sunday dinners, the bond we’ve shared is a classic tale. For a long time, we’ve been a little garden where beautiful things have grown in the most unsuspecting ways. Through the weeds and the dirt, it’s been worth it to see the people we’re becoming.

Still, like birds with a song to sing, we have to branch out. I can finally admit that life is calling us to our own adventures. I’ve never been so happy and yet so sad. I’m celebrating new seasons of life while simultaneously grieving how things have changed. Through it all, I have to give my friends and myself permission to explore and stretch into the places God has prepared for us. The hard truth is nothing remains the same forever. Dynamics evolve and priorities are rearranged. Though painful, this organic shift doesn’t make the bond any less real or valuable.

Though time and space may carry us to different places, the good times will live on. I’ll capture our laughter in mason jars and set them on the shelf for a rainy day. I’ll etch our story into the journal of my heart. I’ll remember how we sat in my living room talking about everything and nothing at all. I’ll smile to myself and look at these hands that held such genuine love. I don’t know the future, but I know change is inevitable. So, I’m accepting it. Whatever happens or doesn’t happen, I’m thankful for a story that only time could tell and only God could write. I’m excited to see what our new normal becomes.

What change do you need to finally accept? Acknowledge it. Cry if you need to. Let yourself feel the sting of losing something old and solid or the weight of gaining something new and uncertain. Remember you have to flip through a book to get to the good parts. You never know what awaits, but you do know that God will meet you there. The leaves have to change. They usher in the beauty of Fall. Release your grip, take a breath, and accept it. See you on the other side of the page.

Ecclesiastes 3:1

For everything, there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven.